Occasionally when an older TV show makes a comeback or a remake, it doesn't totally bomb, and the outcome is a fairly enjoyable piece of entertainment. I would say that although hokey and very Disney channel esq, that Corey and Topanga coming back on our screens was overall a well done show. It follows the life of their quirky, out-going, and full of love and sunshine daughter Riley. Everything about Riley is happy and sunny and bright. Very little discourages her or brings her down. Until the episode with the bully. We see Riley, tears streaming down her face, sitting on her bed, thinking. "What a rough day in Rileytown."
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As someone who tries to find the silver linings in all of life's happenings, I found myself looking at the past few weeks much the way Riley did. "What a rough day in Rileytown" is how I've sort of summarized the past few months of seemingly consistent down hill ups and downs. Its hard not to feel a little beat down when can't even stand before the next blow lands.
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These experiences can leave me feeling so isolated, and so alone in the fight. It's why I've chosen to be very public with things.
It's not just been my health- it's everything my health has affected.
It's not just been my job (or lack thereof) it's everything my job has affected.
It's not just my relationship- it's everything my relationship affected.
It's not just the secret hurts I was holding- it's everything they affected.
It's not just the accident- it's everything the accident affected.
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Every time I have let people into the hurt in my heart, I have been loved. And I am so thankful for that and blessed by it. But man, I'm ready to stop having hurt to expose. I'm ready to just be full of sunshine again. To not have to chase the silver linings but bask in their glow.
I'm tired. I don't know if I'm allowed to feel that way with all the support and love I've experienced, but I am. I am just simply worn out. I can't keep going like this. My heart is worn out from the berating life keeps throwing at it. It takes so much energy to stay upbeat when the last thing you want to do is be..up..beat.
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It's been a rough time in Rileytown. But I am being constantly held up by the people God has surrounded me with.
I am tired, but I am loved.
I am weak, but I am supported.
I am broken, but I am held together supernaturally by His grace.
-M
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